Harry here, I remember the fella that starts his first review here at AICN with this one. He joined me, Moriarty and a couple of crazy femmes at a burrito barn somewhere near that mall. The main thing about him that struct me was how he had the funniest lisp i've ever heard.... because it wasn't consistent. It was like he would forget he had it, then it would come back. And he would get the hiccups after each hot pepper. And once when Moriarty accidently (so the story goes) put his hand on his thigh, he did a spit take that left a piece of tomato on the side of Moriarty's face. I liked Chester Cobblepot, he was quite the character. However, at this moment I hate him. He's seen BLADE 2 and I haven't. That's not fair. I want to see badass Blade action and the praise regarding the 'digital stuntmen' and drawing comparisons to SPIDER-MAN has piqued my interest. Well, here's Chester Cobblepot...

Hey, Harry,

You don't know me, but we met once at a mall in Pasadena where there was an Iron Giant signing. You and Moriarty and some other people were there, and I talked to you guys for a while. Thanks for being cool that day, and let me fill you in on a scoop since you did:

BLADE II really whips the llama's ass, as the WinAmp guy used to say. I saw it last night, and it is cool from the start to the end. If you liked the first one, you'll love this one. If you hated the first one, you still might love this one. The film is fast, violent as shit, and filled with the sort of cool one-liners and action beats that turn films into geek favorites. This feels like the ALIENS of the BLADE franchise, bigger and more dangerous than the orinigal, and filled with characters who can kick some serious ass when the time comes.

I'm scared of one thing, though. New Line and the MPAA could still screw this one up. The studio better get behind Del Toro if this one's going to make it to the screen with its balls still attached. There are some wild, extreme gore moments in this film, stuff that I haven't even dreamed of seeing onscreen since the heyday of Chris Walas and Rob Bottin and Tom Savini, nasty wet effects that had people cheering all around me whenever they happened. The Reapers... holy shit, how cool are the Reapers? They're mutant vampires that feed on other vampires, super powerful crack addicts who are impervious to garlic and silver, and whose hearts are encased in a hard bone chamber that provides better-than-average protection. These things look pretty much human until they go into feeding mode, and when that happens, LOOK THE FUCK OUT.

I was surprised that the film worked as a horror movie and an action movie both. There‚s a sequence where the Reapers are finally attacking the heroes of the film en masse, an attack that takes place on about four different fronts at once, that starts out exciting, then gets scarier and scarier. If the film isn‚t allowed to be extreme, like the cut we saw tonight, then those sequences will lose their punch. The thing that had people crawling over the seats, hiding in fear, is that you don‚t know just how extreme things will get, and each new envelope that gets pushed surprises you. BLADE not only carries a sword... he actually uses it. People get slashed, heads get split open, and bodies are cut in two, and there are more gallons of blood in this film than there are in John Goodman.

THIS IS A GOOD THING!!

THIS IS A GOOD THING!!

THIS IS A GOOD THING!!

The first BLADE had that one great sequence right at the start, and then settled in as a decent B-level action film for the rest of the running time. The FX work was nice, even if the Blood God was cheesy. This time out, the film starts with a quiet bang, and slowly builds in intensity. Each scene really does top what came before. By the time we got to the end, the audience was totally pumped. They cheered three times within five minutes during one sequence, applauding loudly each time.

The Bloodpack are badasses. They're vampires who were trianed for two years to hunt and kill Blade. They have to work with him, though, to kill the Reapers before they spread. Ron Perlman is the main vamp in the Bloodpack, a guy named Reinhart, and when he meets Blade, it's a great scene. GREAT. He's a sonofabitch, and pulls no punches, and Blade comes right back at him with brutal force. Even the scenes that aren't gory have a visceral kick to them, a hard edge that many action movies lack.

This isn't the best film of Del Toro's life. That would be last year's DEVIL'S BACKBONE. This isn't anything like that. This is a lean, mean, commercial machine. New Line's got their big crossover hit right now with LORD OF THE RINGS, and BLADE II gives them a chance to have one of their old-fashioned R-rated genre hits. If they're smart, their March release could be MATRIX-lucky for them. All they have to do is get the word out on the movie. Show it to conventions. Start the word of mouth going.

Oh, yeah. Kris Kristofferson comes back. I thought it was pretty lame when I heard he was in the movie, but they spend a good 20 minutes making sure it all works and makes sense and doesn't cheat the first movie. All in all, the continuity from one sequel to the next is better than I expected. Del Toro manages to make Norrington's movie seem a little better just by association. His use of the flashback clip did a good job of tying them together. Whistler has some great lines in the movie, too, when he butts heads with Reinhart as well as Blade's new sidekick, a pothead named Scud.

Overall, this was a hell of a lot more fun than I expected walking into the theater, and I can't wait to see it finished and slick and with the sound effects and score mixed properly. The use of the CG stuntmen is awesome, and seems to scoop SPIDER-MAN by a full two months.

Call me Chester Cobblepot if you use this, Ginger.