Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. Well, it's that time of year again, isn't it? This time of year is always stressful, but ultimately I find it very rewarding. I don't know if I work as hard on any single thing every year as I do this Guide. It's like all 4 days of Comic-Con at once, or all 12 days of Sundance or all nearly 200 A Movie A Day articles piled on top of each other, but it's worth it. After last year's Gift Guide I was hearing from people who read it all the way into the summer months.
Below you're going to find the results of about a month of scouring the internet for the best geek stuff I could find, many of which were suggested by you guys. I'll be breaking them down into categories (DVDs, Books, Art, Clothing, Electronics, etc) and each category will have a pricing subcategory. Here's how the pricing breaks down:
CHEAP - Items $24.99 and under
MODERATE - Items $25.00-$70.99
EXPENSIVE - Items $71.00-$499.99
And
FOR THE SUPER RICH ONLY - Items $500.00 and up
I link to a variety of sources, but most common things, like books and DVDs, will be Amazon for their ease in ordering, free shipping, selection and availability. I would strongly recommend signing up for Amazon Prime if you use Amazon regularly. I made the plunge last year and it's one of the best decisions I made. $79 a year and you get free 2 day shipping on almost everything and overnight for only $3.99.
But I'm not married to Amazon. I also really like DeepDiscount.com, but I've had trouble with them recently being always out of stock on all their sales items, meaning a month or more of waiting for them to get new stock in and their prices are all comparable to Amazon. Full disclosure, I do get a tiny commission on anything bought through the Amazon links, which will be going into the "Pay off Quint's New TV" fund.
You're going to find a lot of high def discussion below. We're in an odd time, a transitional period. All new releases are released in Blu-Ray right now as well. There are sales on Blu-Ray players this week that puts them under $200, making them finally affordable and I think by this time next year Blu-Ray will be damn near dominating the home video market.
I'm a little drunk on it at the moment myself, having just gotten that aforementioned HDTV and my first stand alone BR player, so please forgive my excitement over the Blu-Ray releases.
Like the last few years, I'm going to break the Gift Guide up into 3 different articles. Keep an eye out for giveaways. I won't say which sections they will be in, but I have two main giveaways that total more than $1200 worth of goodies and I guarantee you any geek worth their salt will want both items I'm giving away.
Before we dive in, I just want to thank you guys in advance for supporting the column over the years and for reading along again this year. This Guide isn't supposed to be the end all be all list... it's very personal to me, following my interests and curiosities and it's always rewarding for me to get such positive feedback, even though by the end of this my fingers will be nothing but bloody stumps and I will have gotten literally zero sleep before Thanksgiving... well, it's you guys who make it worth it, so thanks.
Let's have at it, shall we?
DVDS
You're going to find a lot of Blu-Ray titles below. I'll also make sure to list prices for Standard Def releases since BR hasn't taken over the world quite yet, but I can't recommend making the jump to high-def enough. HDTVs are falling in price and combining Blu-Ray with a nice High-Def TV is unbelievably amazing looking. You'll find Standard Def, Blu-Ray and SD and BR Imports (a bit pricier, but unavailable in the US) below!
Quick note: It might not be a bad idea to keep an eye on all of Amazon's Black Friday sales by clicking here. I see they're already matching almost all the store deals you can find, but as always, comparison shop (my personal favorite Black Friday site is blackfriday.info).
CHEAP ($24.99 and Under)
Ah, sweet majesty thy name is Colbert. The Christmas Special DVD is amazing... as cheesy as you'd want, totally tongue-in-cheek. At $12.99 it's the must buy of the holiday season.
If you buy the Colbert Christmas Special you have to double feature it with Pee-Wee's Christmas Special. They are amazingly similar. Corny effects, bizarre choices for musical guests and both get me instantly in the holiday season. Only $4.99.
Wall-E popped the cherry on my new TV and there really is no better HDTV test than Pixar. Next to THE INCREDIBLES this is my favorite Pixar film. Blu-Ray $24.99 and 3-disc special edition Standard Def starting at $15.09
This marks the first release of a vintage Disney film on a high def format and to say it's jaw-dropping is an understatement. In fact, Sleeping Beauty was one of the first Disney films I saw in a theater during its '80s re-release (the first full Disney animated feature I saw being SONG OF THE SOUTH... remember when Disney used to acknowledge this movie existed?) and I don't remember it looking better in the theater. $19.99 Blu-Ray and $14.99 Standard Def.
This is a movie I've been hearing about since I was a kid. I remember seeing commercials for this movie when I was a kid and The Disney Channel actually used to show worthwhile shit. Now having seen it, I can't recommend it enough. I'd give my right arm if Disney would go back to doing to family friendly horror like this film and SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES and WATCHER IN THE WOODS. It's currently at $24.99.
After seeing the great Ron Howard flick based on the tapings of these interviews this DVD is one of my most anticipated DVDs out there. I've never seen the interviews and I can't wait to see them unfold for myownself. This disc is released on December 2nd. $18.49.
It
I can't believe I haven't seen this yet as I'm the world's biggest fan of the original Sleepaway Camp. I'm comfortable in recommending it based solely on Vern's review, which makes me believe it lives up to my wildest expectations. Plus it's one that I'm hoping Santa brings me this year... If you haven't seen the original SLEEPAWAY CAMP, you must. It'll blow your mind. This is the official sequel, made by the original team. $19.99.
One of the best films ever made in high definition? Hell yeah! See Morgan Freeman's freckled face in 1080p! The Blu-Ray hits December 2nd! $19.99.
I've found that High Def black and white releases don't get as much attention as color films and I can't understand it. I remember when I got Casablanca in HD I was mesmerized. Black and White is beautiful and I can't wait to see one of the best black and white science fiction films of all time presented in Blu-Ray... guess it's the silver lining to the turd-cloud of a remake coming out... $20.49.
If you haven't seen John Carpenter's ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 then you owe this one to yourself and once again, I can't wait to see how the gritty '70s cinematography translates into high def. It'll surely be the best presentation on this title I've ever seen (and I've seen it big, too). In my mind, this is where Carpenter found his voice as a filmmaker. Blu-Ray is $19.99 and is released on December 2nd.
I love the first collection of Tenacious D's Master Works... Butt-Baby is one of the most amazing things the D has ever done. This is another one on my Christmas List. High Def Tenacious D! Blu-Ray is $21.49, Standard Def $14.99.
I know people that hate Kevin Smith's movies, but love his An Evening With series and there's good reason. The man's great on stage and I would even put his stuff up next to some of my favorite stand-up specials. He's got a way with crowds and is always shockingly honest and entertaining. $13.99.
This could be the only standard def title that I recommend over a high def version that's out. Lebowski is a damn classic, but isn't out in Blu-Ray (only HD-DVD, which looks great if you have a player) and was released in a nifty bowling ball package that makes it a perfect gift item. Awesome cult movie, awesome cult packaging. And $23.99.
The grandfather of slashers as we came to know and love them, pre-dating HALLOWEEN, which gets the credit for killer POV and other staples of slasher cinema... featuring the amazingly gorgeous Olivia Hussey, pre-insane Margot Kidder and John Motherfuckin' Saxon... Directed by the late Bob CHRISTMAS STORY Clark, this is one you must add to the list if you haven't seen it! Vintage Slasher on Blu-Ray High Def for $17.99!
We've gotten an absurd amount of email about this British Show basically focusing on Big Brother reality show that is being taped during a zombie apocalypse. I'm giving this a blind recommend as I haven't had a chance to see it yet, but the fanaticism that has already sprung up around it leads me to believe it's going to be awesome. It appears to be region-free, but it is PAL, so take that under advisement. 11.99 pounds plus shipping from Amazon.co.uk.
MODERATE ($25.00-$70.99)
Sam Fuller's White Dog is a film I saw a long time ago theatrically during a retrospective of the filmmaker and have been dying to see it on DVD ever since. It's about a dog that is trained to kill black people and Paul Winfield is brought in to deprogram the dog. Winfield is amazing in the movie, giving one of the best overlooked performances of his career and Sam Fuller gives us an ending that's a punch in the taint. Criterion put out this release so you can be assured of quality. $26.99 at Amazon.
LOST had a little dip in the second season, but by the time it hit this fourth season it was back to form. Jack, Kate, Sawyer, Locke and, probably the most interesting, Ben are front and center for one of LOST's best seasons since its first. $49.99 on Blu-Ray and $36.99 Standard Def.
Freaks & Geeks is a show I finally, after years of hearing about it, bought earlier this year and now I have an unhealthy crush on Linda Cardellini. They just released a big release of this disc that was $119.99 when I first added it to this guide, but is now $67.99 at Amazon.
One of the most fun tentpole movies of the year, in my opinion overshadowing Spielberg, Lucas and Ford's return to the fedora, IRON MAN is a must-own for any geek. It has heart, laughs, awesome action and a great central performance by Robert Downey Jr. Not that you need me to tell you that, but this is one I guarantee is high on the rewatch factor. Blu-Ray is $25.99 and Standard Def 2 disc SE is $22.99
One, this movie is fuckin' funny and two the commentary track is one of the best commentaries I've heard since the CANNIBAL: THE MUSICAL drunk commentary. You remember when Robert Downey Jr. says in the film that he doesn't drop character until the DVD commentary? Well, he doesn't. It's awesome and worth the purchase alone. The new scenes are nice, but don't radically change the movie, but it's all about the commentary on this one. Blu-Ray is $26.99 and Standard Def SE is $22.99.
Now for a complete 180. If TROPIC THUNDER is light, vulgar fun, the two PARADISE LOST documentaries will make you either angry or suicidal. Hopefully angry. It's about the complete sham of a trail as a group of teenagers are accused of brutally assaulting and murdering three boys. These guys aren't saints, but the more we investigate the evidence, the more flimsy it gets and it gets to a point where these Southern lawyers enter in the fact that they dress in black and read Stephen King books as reasons why they could be murderers... and are taken seriously! It's allowed. One of the best villains of all time, one of the murdered child's father, John Mark Byers, resides here. The man is a horror show and by the end of the last film if you aren't sure he's the real murderer then you weren't paying attention. These aren't new films, but they're absolutely captivating and underseen. $26.99 for both films.
Criterion Blu-Ray? Le sighh... THE THIRD MAN is one of the most beautifully photographed black and white films of all time and the concept of having this in high def... I won't lie, it makes my seat wet a little bit. Forgetting the visuals, this is just an outstanding mystery noir featuring one of Orson Welles' best characters ever, Harry Lime. If you haven't seen this movie then you have absolutely no excuse. This is a must. It releases on December 16th, but is available for pre-order. $28.99.
Leave it to the Coen Bros to deliver yet another quirky, unusual and tremendously entertaining comedy. I really flipped for this film upon seeing it theatrically and can't wait to add this to the shelf. I mean, George Clooney's Purple Fuck Pillow in high def? Who could turn that down? Releases December 21st, but available for pre-order. Blu-Ray is $27.99 and Standard Def is $17.99.
There are two sets of Bond Blu-Ray released, but this is the best bundle, featuring my personal favorite James Bond flick FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE (guess why). You also get THUNDERBALL and FOR YOUR EYES ONLY in this set for $57.99. The less spectacular set (in my opinion) of DIE ANOTHER DAY, DR. NO and LIVE AND LET DIE is also $57.99, but Amazon is offering a special on both sets of of Bond Blu-Ray for $106.99.
This is one of the better gift sets to come out this quarter. It's a nerd's dream... Guillermo del Toro fantasy movie that comes packaged with a Drew Struzan poster, a mini-toy and a reproduction of Guillermo's sketch book? All that AND the 3-discs of Hellboy 2 features? I can't speak to the material within the DVD as I don't have a copy of any edition of this yet, but based on del Toro's past history with DVD releases, I'm sure it's all very great stuff. This edition is above and beyond the standard DVD gift. Blu-Ray Collector's Edition is $44.99, regular Blu-Ray is $25.49, Standard Def Collector's Edition is $39.49, and Standard Def SE is $17.99.
One of the best films of all time, a guaranteed night of sexual gratification if you have gift this to your girlfriend/wife/partner. This Ultimate Collector's Edition comes with the movie in high-def (the HD-DVD looked stunning, so I can't wait to see how it looks on Blu-Ray), a photo book, 10 reproduction cards of original movie art for the film, archival correspondence and, my favorite bonuses, a Casablanca passport holder and luggage tag! How sweet is that? Released on December 2nd and available for pre-order. I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship... Blu-Ray Collector's Set is $41.49 and Standard Def Collector's Edition is $38.99.
It's not Christmas without A CHRISTMAS STORY. This isn't the first time this title has seen a high def release, but there are 2 gift sets for this release. The Blu-Ray set comes packaged with a string of Leg Lamp Christmas lights. I'm a little upset that the Blu-Ray edition doesn't come with the goodies in the Standard Def set, but c'est la vie. Blu-Ray Ultimate Collector's Edition is $34.99.
The Standard Def set comes with the flick, 5 cookie cutters (Leg Lamp, Parker house and Bunny Suit amongst the shapes), a Christmas Story Apron and a 48 Page Holiday Recipe cookbook. It's a little bit of bullshit that the Blu-Ray, which costs more, doesn't come with any of those nicknacks, but I guess that's the price you pay for 1080p brilliance. Standard Def Ultimate Collector's Edition is $29.99.
The classiest Blu-Ray set on the market this holiday season. The Godfather films have been praised to the limits of space and time, so you don't need me to tell you how incredible these films are, but I will say that if you have a Blu-Ray player or are even thinking about getting one this set should be your first purchase. Incredible transfers. When watching the first one you won't believe that it was shot nearly four decades ago. $61.99.
THE DARK KNIGHT was probably the first film I saw since I was 12 and watching JURASSIC PARK unfold before me that made me completely forget I was in a movie theater watching a film. The screen was indeed a window into another reality and I got lost in it. This is by far my most anticipated holiday release and I love that there's a special edition Batpod display available! You don't need me to convince you on this one. It's a perfect storm of brilliant filmmaking, performances and story. Blu-Ray Special Edition with Batpod Stand is $47.99, the Stand-Alone Blu-Ray release is $23.99 and Standard Def SE is $20.99.
This is the first of a few imports you'll see on the list this year. It's the perfect gift for someone who has a Blu-Ray set-up, but you don't know what titles they have or not. This release of Almost Famous... first off, that poster makes me feel funny in my tummy. I've always loved it and this title isn't available in the US, but the UK did an all region pressing that you can pick up on Amazon for a very decent price, just order early as it takes 1-3 weeks to arrive. It's one of my favorite movies of the last 10 years and one of the most personal films for me personally... I love it and can heartily recommend it.$30.99 via Amazon.
Goonies Blu-Ray!!!!! Not on any release schedule for the US as I know of, but this Import Blu-Ray is available. Much like Almost Famous, it will take between 1-3 weeks to ship so buy early! I can't wait to see Chunk's flab roll in a 1080p Truffle Shuffle! $37.49 via Amazon.
All the Boys Love Mandy Lane is the debut horror film from THE WACKNESS's Jonathan Levine and an incredibly fun and inventive one at that. It got usurped by the Weinsteins and as a result hasn't seen the light of day in American theaters or home video, so this is an especially interesting Import. Supposedly an all-region pressing, high def version of this movie would be a must for the horror geek that has everything. $45.99 via Amazon.
Speaking of not released in the US, here's John Woo's RED CLIFF, an epic period actioneer that I have gotten a chance to view and it's frankly awesome. I see one copy available for $19.99 (plus $3 shipping) on Amazon and that's a steal. Hopefully more pop up or someone in the talkbacks can link us to an import site with more copies available.
This import becomes available December 2nd, but you can pre-order it on Amazon for a very decent price. SIN CITY was made for the high-def experience and I'm itching to check it out personally! Maybe Import Santa will stuff my stocking full of goodies this year! Blu-Ray Import $29.99 via Amazon.
EXPENSIVE ($71.00-$499.99)
That is a Standard Def Region 2 Japanese Import set for GRINDHOUSE, supposedly containing the full theatrical experience, all the trailers, etc. I'd suggest doing a little more research than I did to verify as I've never seen this set, so I can't vouch for it personally. Around $80 or 7481 yen.
Abbott & Costello: Complete Universal Collection contains 28 Abbott and Costello features, including their most famous like ABBOTT & COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN. There's nothing like gifting someone 28 damn movies at the same time, especially if they're all starring one of the great comic teams in the history of film! $83.99.
Contains Lynch's best stuff, including ERASERHEAD (and soundtrack), BLUE VELVET, THE ELEPHANT MAN, WILD AT HEART and a ton of Lynch weirdness, including "mystery discs" containing never before released unknowns from Lynch's personal archives. You also get a collectible booklet... this was one of the more requested items from readers and it looks pretty awesome for any David Lynch fanatic. $129.99.
Holy Crap! Complete set of High Def Planet of the Apes, including the new cut of CONQUEST OF THE PLANET OF THE APES. I have this set, but haven't busted it open yet. I want to relish these, going movie by movie. I've never watched them in a row before... If nothing else, the packaging and included hardbound book is worth the price, let alone all the high def discs packed with special features! $91.99.
For the vintage film lover. I've been diving headlong into classic films over the past 5 months with my A Movie A Day column and I can't recommend discovering some of these classics enough or the cool factor associated of passing on these classic works on for others to discover. Included in this Columbia set are LAWRENCE OF ARABIA, GANDHI, KRAMER VS. KRAMER, OLIVER!, A MAN FOR ALL SEASONS, THE BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI, ON THE WATERFRONT, FROM HERE TO ETERNITY, ALL THE KING'S MEN, YOU CAN'T TAKE IT WITH YOU and IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT. The set includes a booklet giving notes on each film and detailing the Oscars it won. $99.99 for 14 classic films!.
This is another one that's on my Christmas Wishlist. I love westerns, especially hardcore westerns, but have never seen one episode of DEADWOOD. I know it's going to be up my alley, but when HBO wanted something like $70 a season... well, I couldn't foot that. Now they've packaged all three seasons together at a reasonable price so maybe I'll finally get a chance to mainline this show. $105.49 for the Complete Series.
This is one of the coolest DVD sets on this list. 17 Discs containing every single episode of BATMAN: THE ANIMATED SERIES from Paul Dini and Bruce Timm. This is bliss for any geek ages 2 to 102. Only $75.99.
This thing is amazing looking. Standing about a foot tall, it's definitely a real deal collectible Jack Skellington Bust. The base holds the Standard Def DVD release as well as beard and Santa Hat that you can put on Jack. It also talks and the sound is real loud and not out of a shitty little mumbling speaker. The DVD release itself is great, including the full Frankenweenie short as well as Vincent! Disney's limited edition Skellington Busts go for $159.99, the stand-alone Standard Def DVD release goes for $20.99 and the Blu-Ray (highly recommended) is $22.99.
What's this? There's magic in the air! Disney is offering up 3 of the limited edition Jack Skellington Busts for giveaway right here in this very column! This is limited to our North American readers only. I'm going to give one away to a talkbacker and two away in a trivia contest any reader can enter.
For the first one, for the talkbackers... You see that time stamp on your posts? I will award one of the Busts, $159 value, to the one who is closest to having their post time-stamped at 10:37:62 PM (without going over) on Sunday, November 30th. If there's a tie, I will pick a winner randomly. The only condition for a talkbacker win is that you have to live in the Continental US. I'll announce the winner in the talkbacks and email them personally.
For the other two, I'm going to give you guys a series of animation trivia questions below. I want you to copy them, paste them in an email to me (quint@aintitcool.com) with your answers. I also need your mailing address (in the Continental US) included. Every answer has to be correct. Make sure you read carefully as there might be some sneaky stuff going on below.
1) What Animal House star's voice can be heard in HEAVY METAL? Answer:
2) Ralph Bakshi directed the X-rated animated cartoon FRITZ THE CAT. Who created Fritz? Answer:
3) Willis O'Brien is the father of stop-motion effects. What was his pseudonym? Answer:
4) What was Ray Harryhausen's first color film? Answer:
5) What was the month, day and year that Tim Burton's Vincent was released? Answer:
6) Barret Oliver starred in Tim Burton's Frankenweenie as Dr. Frankenstein in 1984. What other kid's movie classic did Oliver star in that same year? Answer:
7) Who produced Puppetoons? Answer:
I'll post the names of the winners as well as the answers as soon as I get them. Good luck!
ELECTRONICS
CHEAP ($24.99 and Under)
A ray gun that is also a remote control, so you can change the channel on your TV by firing at it with your Martian weaponry!!! 9.95 pounds.
You know, I have a nearly $300 remote controlled Wall-E listed in the toys section, but the best Wall-E I've seen... looking at all the toys, sculpts, statues, etc, is this one, the cheap iDance Wall-E. His construction is by far the best, the other ones looking way too plasticy, and he makes Wall-E noises when you pop some batteries into him. He'll act as a speaker for your iPod and you can set him to dance along to the music (which is adorable). But without all that, you can just turn him on and he'll react to you speaking. It's really awesome and cheap! Only $19.99!
MODERATE ($25.00-$70.99)
Earbud computer speakers! Yeah, awesome, right? It's fucking ridiculous, absolutely, but awesome! $44.99.
You never in a million years thought you'd want this thing until just now, am I right? I don't know why a Darth Vader Toaster exists, but I'm somehow very happy it does. $54.99.
EXPENSIVE ($71.00-$499.99)
Yes, you're seeing that right. It's a GPS system from Mio using the voice of William Daniels, the original voice of KITT. He recorded 150 common boy names and 150 common girl names that you can program so he'll greet you personally upon start-up. The lights are in sync with his voice. A bit pricier than your average GPS system at $245.95, but the geek factor makes it more than worth the price.
I originally scoffed at this device, which is why I didn't include it in last year's guide. It was $100 more expensive then and you know... I just hate reading shit off of screens. I spend so much of my life in front of this computer, I don't care to do my casual reading on it. I have to print out most scripts and I can not read a book on a screen. My eyes just won't let me. But then a friend of mine got this and showed it to me. I was amazed at how there was no eye-strain, that the electronic pages are incredibly paper-like. So, I'm turning around on it. I still wouldn't drop $359 on it, but I have a feeling that Amazon's Black Friday deal day will have some kind of special on them. I might make the plunge.
It's time. If you haven't done so yet, you have to make the jump. This is the Blu-Ray player I bought. It's not top of the line, but I don't know what the fuck else mine could do. The picture is amazing, the sound output is ball-rumbling and it starts up quickly. Right now it's under $200, coming in at $199.99 on Amazon. There's a Sony going for about $50 cheaper, but I read bad things about it. I've not had one disc quit playing or freeze on me since I've gotten this Samsung. It's the future. You gotta get on board!
FOR THE SUPER RICH ONLY ($500.00 and Up)
I fretted over buying a new TV for months. In all my research, that 61" Samsung Series 7 was the best value for its price and I made the plunge and I haven't regretted it for one second. It's now listing at $1507.13 which is up almost a hundred bucks from what I bought it at for some reason, but I'm not here to sell you on this model. I know the economy is shit now, so this might not be a priority for you, but if you're on the fence about upgrading to HDTV, I can only tell you now's the time. They're falling in price. Start looking here and keep an eye on Amazon's Black Friday specials, but also read up on the local WalMart, Circuit City and Best Buy HDTV deals using sites like blackfriday.info. You can get a real HDTV for under $1000 now and maybe even under $800. You'll be glad you did.
CLOTHING
CHEAP ($24.99 and Under)
Metal band fonts for famous directors! Brilliant! You can order a shirt with one of these badboys on it for $24.00.
Last Metal Director shirt, I swear, but it's De Palma, man... $24.00
The cool kids know why that shirt rules! From MondoTees and coming it at $20.00.
MODERATE ($25.00-$70.99)
Indiana Jones' Fedora. I don't need to say any more. $39.99 from Sideshow.
This LED shirt will definitely draw gazes and I think it's pretty sweet, but I can't imagine how much of a pain it'd be to clean. 20 pounds via thumbsupuk.com
I have a few bonaroo.co.uk shirts, an Escape From New York shirt and a Jaws shirt, and I wear them all the time. Great stuff, highest quality and they make their shirts in fat people sizes! Got a few of my favorites that they've added on in the last year, starting with the above awesome They Live tee! 14.99 pounds
That one's for you, Jeff Mahler! I don't think they make them in baby-tee sizes, unfortunately, but the rest of us can wear those shirts, rock out to the Beach Boys, put away our razors and play some awesome werewolf basketball! 14.99 pounds
Probably the most obscure Tarantino shirt ever, but then again Jackie Brown is one of the most underrated movies of the '90s. Love it! 14.99 pounds.
EXPENSIVE ($71.00-$499.99)
Sure, you'd probably get your ass kicked for wearing that in school, but now you're a grown man (or woman) and don't have to worry about those little bastards and can wear your Stormtrooper Hoodie with pride. It'll set you back, $98.00, though.
Swatch has a run of badass James Bond Villain watches. To see the complete rundown, visit the Swatch Website here. My favorites are the three listed here. The above is the Goldfinger watch (obviously) and will set you back $230
The La Chiffre watch, representing Casino Royale is the one I'd probably get since I love my my Hold 'Em and it's much cheaper than the Goldfinger watch, coming in at $110.00.
But hands down, the ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE edition is the coolest, featuring SPECTRE's logo fully. God, this is beautiful watch! My stepdad would flip. He's a James Bond fanatic... $115.00
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here with today’s installment of A Movie A Day.
[For those now joining us, A Movie A Day is my attempt at filling in gaps in my film knowledge. My DVD collection is thousands strong, many of them films I haven’t seen yet, but picked up as I scoured used DVD stores. Each day I’ll pull a previously unseen film from my collection and discuss it here. Each movie will have some sort of connection to the one before it, be it cast or crew member.]
Holy shit! There are a few movies in this world that just make me insanely happy that they exist… for the sheer reason that they shouldn’t.
Peter O’Toole, Malcolm McDowell, John Gielgud and Helen Mirren starred in a film produced by Penthouse featuring hardcore ‘70s sex and some of the most twisted, vile, wrong and revolting imagery ever put to film.
I repeat, Peter O’Toole… Lawrence of Arabia… is in a Penthouse film partly directed by Bob Guccione, publisher of Penthouse.
This movie blows my mind a little bit. As decedent and insane as Caligula was thought to have been, this movie is even moreso. It’s huge, like Cleopatra or Ben Hur with graphic sex. There’s more cocks, vaginas, lesbos, homos, straighties, blow-jobs, midget sex, incest and debauchery than on any random google search.
And graphic violence… Unbelievable violence. There is literally a moving wall… has to be at least 100 feet high, with rotating blades on the bottom that is slowly pushed over people who have pissed off Caligula, buried up to their necks in the soil. As the wall moves over them, their heads are lobbed off.
They built that. A team of carpenters and painters put that wall together for this movie.
And the drama in the first half is actually quite good, surprisingly enough. Once Peter O’Toole dies and passes the crown to McDowell’s Caligula the movie rides his charm for a while, but becomes more and more muddled as Caligula grows crazier and crazier.
This is a 2 ½ hour long movie, ladies and gentlemen. It’s treated like a serious film, it has some serious damn people in it, but it’s clear that Guccione wanted a high class, high profile smut film, despite what the great actors involved might have thought it to be.
I can’t believe this movie exists.
There is literally a scene where McDowell fists a soldier. He lubes up this poor man (after making him watch while he deflowers his bride) and shoves his fist up his ass.
That scene was written somewhere and Malcolm McDowell agreed to do it… Actually, doing some research it looks like Caligula was originally meant to pop the new bride’s cherry, then do the same thing with the new husband, but McDowell drew the line at butt-fucking. Globbing his arm up with goo and shoving it in this dude’s ass was, apparently, a more acceptable alternative.
I don’t think I could ever watch this movie again (and yes, I watched the unrated 2 ½ hour cut), but I’m glad I’ve seen it. If someone told me about it, described the scenes I described above with the level of raw acting talent on display… Well, I’d call them a goddamn liar.
And to put a nice shiny cherry on top of the day's experience, I spent the majority of the day at a friend's son's first birthday party, filled with Elmo and Spongebob and family friendly fun... Then I came home to watch CALIGULA.
This movie exists. Unbelievable.
The schedule for the next 7 days is:
Sunday, June 29th: THE ELEPHANT MAN (1980)
Monday, June 30th: THE GOOD FATHER (1987)
Tuesday, July 1st: SHOCK TREATMENT (1981)
Wednesday, July 2nd: FLASHBACK (1990)
Thursday, July 3rd: KLUTE (1971)
Friday, July 4th: ON GOLDEN POND (1982)
Saturday, July 5th: THE COWBOYS (1972)
Tomorrow we follow the great John Gielgud over to David Lynch’s THE ELEPHANT MAN. Can’t wait for that one.
-Quint
quint@aintitcool.com
Previous Movies:
June 2nd: Harper
June 3rd: The Drowning Pool
June 4th: Papillon
June 5th: Gun Crazy
June 6th: Never So Few
June 7th: A Hole In The Head
June 8th: Some Came Running
June 9th: Rio Bravo
June 10th: Point Blank
June 11th: Pocket Money
June 12th: Cool Hand Luke
June 13th: The Asphalt Jungle
June 14th: Clash By Night
June 15th: Scarlet Street
June 16th: Killer Bait (aka Too Late For Tears)
June 17th: Robinson Crusoe On Mars
June 18th: City For Conquest
June 19th: San Quentin
June 20th: 42nd Street
June 21st: Dames
June 22nd: Gold Diggers of 1935
June 23rd: Murder, My Sweet
June 24th: Born To Kill
June 25th: The Sound of Music
June 26th: Torn Curtain
June 27th: The Left Handed Gun
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